Sex Education
I was reading through a certain book that is supposed to educate teachers on how to teach pupils about HIV/AIDS (i just read things). In it there are tiny sections where they feature the kind of questions that pupils (p4-p7) ask on sex. Here are some of them. (The way they were written by the pupils):
1. If you are still a virgin until the age of 18, is it true that you will never have a child? (Question from P.7 girl)
2. Is it true that if a boy doesn’t play sex early his sperms won’t mature?(question from 12 year old P.6 boy)
3. Can a girl of 10 become pregnant? And if a girl is 12 or 13 and she has sex with a boy older than her, can she get pregnant?(13 year old P.6 girl)
4. Some boy told me that if a girl does not have sex, her vagina will close. Is it true?(13 year old P.6 girl)
5. There is a boy who forces me to have sex in the banana plantation . I always tend to refuse. I have not told my parents because I fear they will beat me.(girl in upper primary)
6. What happens when one uses a condom for more than one round?(P.7 Boy)
7. Whenever I wake up in the morning, I find myself wet dreams but my friends tells me to play sex, is it true?
8. There is a widow in my village who come at my house. She says open the door that she wants me to sex her. What shall I do to escape her?(11 year old boy in upper primary)
9. I have my brother who asked me for sex when I told him that I am still young for sex, he told me that he will find me on the way and kill me. (16 year old BOY in p.7) Editor’s notes: this is so so screwed up!!
10. When I sit with a girl my penis elects and others say I should have sex to stop the election. Will this help? (p.6.11years. boy)
And this one really puzzled me because I was reading it for the first time: myths about sex: when you wash your vagina with Coca Coal after having sex, you do not get pregnant! (Where do kids get such things from?)
There are so many! When I read these questions, I realized that I had never had sex education from any of my parents. I just picked stuff from school, t.v and from all over. I can even bet my mum thinks I do not know I am a girl yet. Which makes me dread the day I will get married because it will hit her real bad. Poor mother!
To you reader: when was the first time heard/learnt about sex? What myths did you hear about it? Where were you told babies came from? (My mum told me that they picked me from a market. To date, when she is upset with me, she jokingly asks me when my real parents will come for me. Imagine!)…and to borrow a question from African Woman, “How easily do you talk about sex?”
I have an inquisitive 4 year old nephew. When you say a word he has never heard of he always asks. The other day I said “mukwano” then he said: “what is mukwano?” I dread the day when he will hear a condom advert on radio and will come and ask me or his mother what a condom is. How do you explain that to say, a 7 year old?
Blogger parents, have you prepared yourself for such moments?
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“I believe the children are our are future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be.”
Whitney Houston. Greatest Love of all lyrics
May 19, 2009 at 9:48 am
There’s a kid in there I’d tell that universal suffrage hasn’t yet reached gonads in this country. But then, that’s just me.
May 19, 2009 at 11:39 am
I never had any kind of sex education
myself. Learnt most of the stuff through
peers,movies, and practice.
Qns 8 and 9; such heartless relatives.
No. 1, 2.6 and 10 really crackd me.
Now that am a godfather the time to prepare
myself is now.
May 19, 2009 at 3:27 pm
Gwe, these things are not simple. Parents and teachers and, yes, church leaders should be more aggresive with sex education because the other side is not letting up. If no one tells the kids the truth about sex, all they will hear is lies about sex.
May 19, 2009 at 4:02 pm
Sex to be honest for some reason i think i knew about sex as early as 7….i dont know how……i knew how pple have sex, tht you get pregnant if you have sex…..i dont know how….
May 20, 2009 at 12:52 am
these are such heartbreaking questions….
It’s one of those topics i guess we are supposed to stumble “along with”. sooo sad
May 21, 2009 at 11:45 am
really really hard questions those..i find it hard to give my younger brother ‘what tos’, i can only imagine how much i’ll clam up when it comes to kids.and that kid being chased around by his briother-had to read that 5 times and shed a few…crazy!!
came across a book in aristoc that talked about how to go about it…think i’d use all the literature i can come across and come up with a way to hit those sensitive topics…
May 22, 2009 at 10:28 am
got my sex education from the pages of jackie collins and the poor christ of bomba pages 88-105, (i think). i dont think i turned out so bad.
May 23, 2009 at 7:50 am
i don’t there is any way to prepare yourself as a parent for such questions except with experience…
my education was mob advanced. i was the youngest among 3 families so had a number of older cousins who would give it to me straight. i ended up even watching some porn in this mix, when i was like 5 or 6 years old
May 25, 2009 at 6:38 am
My sex education was from my Mom’s older sisters who knew (still know) how to jazz with a teenage boy… ( i had just turned 13)
I noticed that my parents were kinda “shy” and so i told her, and she sat up straight and we started our sessions…
i don’t think it is that easy H, but depending on how easy you relate to your children, then i think that it should be pro-active and not reactive waiting on them to “ask”
but what do i know, parenting ain’t a walk in the park is it now?
May 26, 2009 at 7:43 am
We need to teach the children well that sex is something which should be practiced only under marriage. It is very important people hold on to their lust and not fall for sex outside marriage. I wish people took chastity more as honour and self respect. I wish they spent as much time planning when to get pregnant, with whom, under what circumstances as they do planning their next vacation.
May 28, 2009 at 11:13 am
i stole and read my mum’s novel called pearl in my lower primary;i thnk thats my first distinct encounter with the real act that’s sex. i read it until after P.7, cramming the action pages. dont as me wat my mum was doing with it;she almost run out of hert mind 1st time she saw me with it!
now that 11 year old in qn 10’s one horny one to watch out for. uhhhmmmnnn